Incident, Smelt Again, and And Furthermore
by Barry Blauer
Last Friday morning Betty woke up just before 6:00 and thought she heard knocking at the front door. She came out to the kitchen where I was pouring a glass of ice tea. She wanted to know if I heard it and I didn’t because I’m mostly deaf in my left ear. Then she wondered if she was just dreaming. While she went to look out the patio door toward the backyard I went and got my handgun. The motion detector light was on but that is generally triggered by an animal or the flag on the side porch blowing in the wind. It’s pretty sensitive. She saw something beyond our shed by the fence but couldn’t say what it was and then saw a figure between our fence and the glass business behind us. I only saw the one figure walking back there. They have an early morning dumpster pickup so that’s not unusual to have somebody over there.
She called the neighbor later and told him what we saw and he noticed his garage door was open. He came out afterwards and said the GPS units were missing from both vehicles but he wasn’t sure if they left the door open or if somebody else opened it. He called the police.
We’ve had numerous things happen over the years that pretty much get to be a common thing. Once somebody stole two of Betty’s ornamental ducks off the front porch. Another time I turned on the front yard light just in time to see a young man standing there trying to rip our light off the post. Needless to say the young man took off running and could have very well qualified for the Olympics that night. I’m willing to bet he had to change his underwear when he got home. Also, the back gate on our fence has been unlatched a few times. It’s almost impossible for that gate latch to have come undone by itself. Last year somebody stole all the change out of our car’s console. It probably amounted to $5 and because I didn’t know when it happened I didn’t report it.
We have learned to live with the fact that leeches, bloodsuckers, thieves, and vermin are out there looking for the easy life by stealing from us. I hope I don’t have to surprise them with a shotgun should they ever break into our house.
In hindsight I probably should have called the police and reported two guys in our backyard just before dawn but I tend not to get excited. My major concern is our home, the other stuff doesn’t count.
The people who lived through the Depression used to leave their doors unlock without fear that someone would intrude. They were lucky back then that these same people we’ve got weren’t around in the thirties.
* * *
I remember when I was little my Mother frying smelt and putting them on what seemed to be a huge platter. With six kids she had to fry a lot of them and probably used two frying pans. When the platter was heaping over, she served them.
I’ve loved smelt ever since and we have them quite often. I won’t give out my source, I’m selfish. I fry them up and we eat them almost as soon as they come out of the frying pan. I mentioned before that they’re a stand up meal.
I’ve never been smelt dipping but one year a friend gave us a pail full of freshly dipped Smelt from northern Michigan. I don’t hear of people doing that anymore.
* * *
And Furthermore:
Why don’t theaters have an alarm that goes off when somebody exits through the emergency door? At least it would alert everybody in the theater.
George W. Bush had a record (Governor of Texas, pilot in the Texas National Guard, president of the Texas Rangers). Bill Clinton had a record (Governor of Arkansas, Rhodes Scholar). George H. W. Bush had a record (CIA director, U.S. Ambassador to the U.N., vice president). Ronald Reagan had a record (Governor of California, presidential candidate in 1980 and a well respected actor). Tell me what you know about Oblama.
Two people we can’t believe are the weatherman and politicians. It’s not our doing, it’s theirs.
Mayor Rahm Emanuel of Chicago, Mayor Thomas M. Menino of Boston, and Mayor Edwin Lee of San Francisco decided that the CEO of Chick-fil-A, Dan Cathy, doesn’t have a right to express his religious beliefs (he believes a marriage is between a man and a woman). And then there’s Mayor Michael Bloomberg of New York City who decided that all hospitals in the City should put baby formula under lock and key and keep close tabs on it. He’s trying to coerce new mothers into breast feeding their babies. These guys are control freaks.
The Chick-fil-A appreciation day was a huge success – take that Big Brother!
I finished the book, “The Sixth Man,” by David Baldacci. I’m currently reading, “Life and Times of Nikola Telsa,” by Marc d. Seifer. Just in case I get overwhelmed by 3-phase, AC vs. DC, 133 cycles vs. 60 or 30 cycles, and of course the famous Telsa coil I’ve order three more David Baldacci books.
Until the next time . . .